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Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality downloads of Episode 199: Ben Kraco (Depiction of Man), Episode 198: Tracy Wilson (Outer World, Dahlia Seed), Episode 197: Josh McIntyre (Malevich), Episode 196: Ben Rudolph (Stress Positions, C.H.E.W.), Komarov, Episode 195: Lacey Jade (theyhungusfrompowerlines), Episode 194: Lark S. (Rotting In Dirt, Barrow), Episode 193: Pete Zetlan (Sinaloa), and 375 more.
1. |
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I don't understand so I don't expect you to understand how hard it is
to wake up every day and remove myself from this.
I´m here but I can't find myself.
I can´t trust you but I can't trust anyone.
Not waking but also not dreaming.
Barely breathing.
How did i find myself here?
Bleeding and wounds are not mending.
Will I have the strength to end this all here?
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2. |
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Those years spent in hiding from you.
Unprotected.
Is what made me who I am.
How could you know?
How could you say that you know?
You couldn't and it's been that way for years.
Trying to face myself in the mirror and not shudder with disgust.
Some day I might even believe it's not my fault.
You were all I had and if you hurt me then hurt was all I had
but why'd I have to find that out this way?
This pain is the cycle and it plays on.
Over and over again.
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3. |
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Your love was trauma.
Your guidance was trauma.
Relive this trauma.
Enveloped in this trauma.
All those times you told me you'd rather I be dead than end up like this.
I sat ashamed and played along.
It takes all I have to breathe.
It kills to breathe but the breath is all I am.
It's almost gone and these bones will fall apart too.
The cloud you spit out has no silver lining.
You got your wish.
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4. |
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Un día soñé que volaba,
que el cielo era mío.
Soñé que volaba,
que era libre.
Soñé que rompía las cadenas de aire y dolor
que me solapan al olvido.
Dejadme soñar despierta!
Soñé que no dejaba de soñar,
soñé que podía alcanzar el camino a tus ojos,
soñé que la fúnebre tiniebla despertaba
y rompía todo con su resplandor.
Dejadme soñar despierto!
No dejaba de soñar
y rompía con su resplandor
el camino a tus ojos.
_____________________________________
One day I dreamed that I was flying,
the sky was mine.
I dreamed that I was flying,
I was free.
I dreamed that I broke the chains of air and pain
that move me to oblivion.
Let me dream awake!
I dreamed that I continued dreaming,
I dreamed that I could reach the way to your eyes,
I dreamed that the funeral darkness woke up
and broke everything with its brightness.
Let me dream awake!
I continued dreaming
and It broke with its brightness
the way to your eyes.
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5. |
drei affen - lluvia
03:20
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Lucho con todas mis fuerzas.
Lucho en dirección opuesta.
El viento golpea mi cara.
El frío me hiela el alma.
Arrastrado por las olas y la tormenta.
Me dirijo hacia donde la fuerza de la corriente se le antoja,
arrastrado por olas y la tormenta.
Nado en contra del viento,
con el sabor del miedo,
sabiendo que al final del día
me alumbra tu sonrisa.
Sola en la tormenta,
sola en la inmensidad el océano,
sola en contra del viento.
Lucho con todas mis fuerzas.
Lucho en dirección opuesta.
El viento golpea mi cara.
El frío me hiela el alma.
No hay ola que sea tan alta que me haga retroceder.
Donde cesa la lluvia, me alumbra tu sonrisa.
_______________________________________________
I fight with all my strength.
I fight in the opposite direction.
The wind hits my face.
Cold freezes my soul.
Swept away by the waves and the storm.
I go where the current force feels,
swept away by waves and the storm.
Swimming against the wind,
with the taste of fear,
knowing that at the end of the day
your smile enlightens me.
Alone in the storm,
alone in the immensity of the ocean,
alone against the wind.
I fight with all my strength.
I fight in the opposite direction.
The wind hits my face.
Cold freezes my soul.
There is no wave so high, that let me go back.
Where the rain ceases, your smile enlightens me.
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