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Dysmorphia; Dysphoria

from Prolonged Exposure by All These Fucking Eyes

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Do you ever feel wrong in your own skin? Have you ever been so desperately trapped in your own body? Feeling like your skin’s consuming your insides, shrinking with every wash, like suffocating—being eaten alive.
Being shoved beneath the waves again, again, again
Spinning so violently there’s no such thing as up or down—all you know is how to drown
Down the pills, get your fill; drink, smoke, fuck, repeat until you find meaning...but that purpose never comes and the mirror still cracks every time I look back.
This cycle never ends.
Don’t look at me
Don’t look at me
Don’t look at me
I can’t stand to look at myself.
I can’t fucking face myself.

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from Prolonged Exposure, released February 27, 2019

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